If you haven't read Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, do not read this. Please. I beg of you. If you haven't already read the Harry Potter series, read them. Please. I beg of you.
Anyway, everyone knows about the cultural event that occurs just one week from today: the release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I day cultural event, because no other series has caused children to read hundreds and hundreds of pages. No other series has caused both young and old to absolutely fall in love with it. I've been rereading the series the past few months in order to prepare for it's release, and to gather more thoughts about the character of Snape. I've tried to find hidden or forgotten insight as to his true character.
On Wednesday night, or I suppose Thursday morning, I finished "The Half Blood Prince" at 12:30 am. I knew the end of the book. I remembered it as Harry and Dumbledore are searching for the Horcrux near the end of the book. But then the truth of what happens hit me hard, and I still have the emotional scars to prove it. Crying, I laid in my bed, wide awake. I listened to music. I tried to read online--anything to get my mind off the reality of what the inhabitants of the magical world just experienced: Dumbledore's death. Sigh. Even typing it out hurts my heart.
I realize that many people may believe that this is over the top; after all it is only a story. But the bottom line of my life is that it is never just a story. There is no one else like Dumbledore: no one with his power, his wisdom, his ultimate belief in love, his discerning care for even Malfoy. So the only thing I can do is refuse to believe that he was wrong about Snape. There has to be more than what we know or are capable of understanding. There has to be.
This kicked me in the rear this week when I realized the absolute faith I have in Dumbledore might be greater that the absolute faith I have in God. I know God. I know his charcter. I know his actions. Why can't I, then, trust in Him with all my heart? Afterall, even though I hate to admit it, Dumbledore is a fictional character. God is real. Real real.
Among other things, that is what I want to work on: trusting in the Rock who is my God...and letting my passion for story and heroes roll over into my passion for Him.